So you and your loved one are now Parents! Congratulations! You are now part of a club that will be one of the most important memberships you will ever have. However, a lot of new fathers and re-fathers (you know… 2nd, 3rd etc. child) don’t look at fatherhood with just bliss because the dynamic of their marriage or relationship with their loved one changes so much. Especially SEX.
Well, I’m going to tell you that it doesn’t need to be that way. NO… REALLY! It doesn’t! I know what you are thinking… “But they don’t want me to touch them…” “They are always busy with the baby…” “They say they feel ugly or fat…” “If I even mention sex they will look at me with the fire of a 1000 suns in their eyes” “They blow me off so much that I have just stopped tying…” I hear you. I do, I really do. It can be tough to navigate the waters after birth of a child. It’s also understandable that the first 6-8 weeks will be up in the air. Post surgery recovery is no joke, plus both of you need to find your routine.
However, past the 8-week part things can most defiantly start to get back on track. Now this does require some work on both parties (I’ll talk about your other half another day).
- Communication is key of course, but you need to be more tactful and connect with their experience first to be able to discuss your experience and needs.
- Start the conversation early… while you all are planning baby and once baby is on the way. Now if baby is a surprise then start the conversation once baby is on the way.
- Change things up… Don’t go straight for the “goods.” Tap into your sensual side (guys have a sensual side) and start celebrating all the wonderful changes between you two. This will help meet both of your needs.
So at the end of the day sex after baby is not a lost case. It can be reignited, be juicier, and keep the adult part of your relationship alive.
If you are in the miami area you can register for Blue Pearl Therapeutic Sex After Baby Groups catered to couples, women, and men. Couples therapy as well as individual private sessions are also availiable. Workshops and semenars are held throughout the year on topics of sex, intimacy, and relationships.
Be inspired, connect, life is sexy…