OMGGGG!!! Can things get any more crazy. Don’t know about you but it seems that everywhere I turn it’s all about THE VIRUS, COVID-19, HAND SANITIZER, TOILET PAPER, SHORTAGES, QUARANTINE, SHUT DOWN! It’s on social media, the news, streaming sites, as we go about our day, we see more and more people with face masks on. Now, we are all mostly working remotely or wondering when we get to go back to work. It just NEVER ends!
It’s no wonder that for many of us it can be hard to be in the “same sexual headspace” as our partners. Maybe someone is taking the whole pandemic with ease and the other is stockpiling 500 rolls of TP. The point is each person can be dealing with this stressor in different ways. And surprise! But how we approach the stresses of pandemic life can affect the sexy part of our brain. Yeah, you heard me.
The sexy part of our brain? “You mean there is a part of our brain that is like wearing a teddy or edible underwear?” Well, yes and no. If teddies and edible undies are your thing then yes, but what I really mean is the part of our brain that has sexy thoughts. The part that thinks about opportunity for sex, what you would like to do with you partner, and when you see you partner and think “OMG, we could have sex right now!”
However, when we are really stressed out about getting our basic needs met (like T.P.) then we are not tapping into the sexy part of our brain. So, what do we do if we are on different spectrums?
First, we need to (lovingly) acknowledge where we are in reference to our sexual headspace. If one of you is focused on basic survival needs then the other needs to acknowledge that headspace and perhaps do your part to help navigate that headspace (read: don’t just tell an anxious person everything is fine. That never works. But maybe offer to place that TP online order).
Second, we get to make a plan of what do we really need and both get to help make that happen.
Third, GET OFF! I mean get off social media, the news, or whatever outlet you are feeling your COVID-19 fears. You get only 30 min in the AM to get updated of any major stuff and then move on.
Lastly, reconnect to the things that brings y’all closer together. Cook together, walk to block together, play twister together, anything that will bring about the chill in you and allows for your sexy brain to get creative.