Sex After Baby: Balancing a Healthy Sex Life and Your Own Physical Space

Hi, mom.

I bet you feel like you’re at a crossroads some days—a mother, a partner, a friend, an individual. Each comes with their own rules and obligations. 

But how do you balance a sex life with a partner, your new arrival and your own healing journey? That’s unique to you. There are some tips that can help guide you. Below I’ve listed a few.

How soon can I have sex after a baby?

There’s no hard and fast rule here. You’ve just delivered a life into the world. The important thing is that you give your body time to heal. Here are just some of the common symptoms that can make sex difficult:

• Vaginal tears
• Vaginal dryness
• Discharge from the vagina
• Nipple soreness
• Backaches and joint pain

These issues will probably go away on their own. But doctors recommend that you wait at least four to six weeks before having sex again.

There’s also the emotional aspect to it all. You’ll be experiencing hormone changes, fatigue, lack of sleep, body image issues, etc. It all won’t just go away at once. Be kind to yourself and go as slow as you need to. 

Ways to keep sexual intimacy while you heal

There are ways you can still keep a spicy flame going, even while allowing your body time to adjust after giving birth. 

Ease pain

Seek pain relief, before and after sex. For example, you can take a warm bath, take over-the-counter pain medicine and empty your bladder. Afterwards, if you notice a burning feeling, you can apply an ice-wrapped towel to the area.

Use lubricant

A common symptom after giving birth is vaginal dryness. Try for water-based lubricants, even if you haven’t needed any in the past. 

Foreplay

Increasing foreplay can give your vagina even more time to produce its own lubrication. You can try mutual masturbation, massages, or other arousing activities. 

Communicate with your partner

Be sure to talk with your partner about what does and doesn’t feel good.

There’s no need to rush into anything. 

Honest communication can keep you on the path of a healthy, fulfilling sex life. 

Gabriela.